Some Lessons from my Thirties - so far

Today is my half-birthday, and at this point, I’m heading hard toward my late thirties. This decade has been transformational so far, but it a different way from my twenties, so I’d like to share some lessons that I’ve learned so far in this season of my life.

You will continue to blossom, even in this decade. I used to think that after you get through the first blush of adulthood, that was it. In my thirties I’ve continued to grow and blossom in new ways. If my early life was the tree planted and starting to bloom, my thirties have brought me both fruit and new branches.

Throw the script out the window. Whatever plan you had for your life as a child or teen, let it go. Life will bring you things that you could never have imagined, and you may miss them if you’re holding on too tightly to your idea of what you think life should be like.

Your relationships will require intentionality and effort. Life gets so much more complicated in your thirties, for you and your friends and loved ones. Careers vary drastically; people get partnered, or married, or divorced; their parents age and need more care; they have children at very different times. In order to maintain your friendships (especially!) during all of this, it will need more effort. Plan things and schedule things. It will not be helpful to keep score within the relationship to see who is making the most effort. If you are both making effort, that’s enough.