Question #19
“How do you deal with disappointment?”
Dear F,
Disappointment is tough, because it comes from unmet expectations. One of the things that helps me deal with disappointment, is to acknowledge what my expectations were, and how they were not met. Is there something that I actually had control over? Is there something I could do differently next time?
You can also dig deeper into your disappointment, even though this may make you uncomfortable. Did you have expectations that were not obvious, or that you did not articulate? Why did you have them? Do you feel like this disappointing experience says something about you as a person? Is that really true?
The real key to dealing with disappointment is to face it, as hard as that may be. It doesn’t have to be in a fancy way, you can just say something to yourself like, “I was really hoping this relationship would work out, because I feel like I’m running out of time to find someone, and I’m scared of being alone.” Facing the disappointment empowers you to overcome it.
